Not too long ago, I had a terrifying moment of realisation. Having watched Shaun of the Dead, and then contemplated buying The Last of Us, it suddenly occurred to me that, in the case of a real-life zombie apocalypse, I would be a starter on the undead’s set menu.
I have always been a bit reluctant to exercise. I like to pretend that it’s because I’m creative – that I’d rather spend my time reading or crocheting than getting sweaty – but the truth is that I am lazy. At school I used my barely-existent asthma as an excuse not to participate in athletics. I would purposely get knocked out of rounders games early on, so I could sit and enjoy the sunshine instead. With the exception of the PE lesson where my friend and I invented three-legged badminton (every bit as dangerous and brilliant as it sounds), I cannot think of a sports class that I actually enjoyed.
This pattern has carried on into my adult life. I have occasionally jogged, walked and thought very hard about going swimming and that is the sum total of it. It has been something of a joke amongst my friends that I am allergic to exercise, and having always been naturally thin I’ve never thought I had much of a reason to prove them wrong. But the other day, between the zombie apocalypse epiphany and having to catch my breath on the stairs between Topshop and Topman, I realised that the joke wasn’t all that funny anymore.
So I sat and had a good think about what I want from a fitness regime. I knew I wanted to get fitter, but that it wasn’t about shifting pounds and looking skinny. I needed something relatively low impact to ease myself in gently, and so I plumped for a bit of yoga. For the last week or so I have been using the Yoga Studio app to do a short class every day and you know what? I’ve loved it. Even after such a short space of time, I feel stronger, more alert and much, much calmer. In fact, I’ve enjoyed it so much that I’m off to a proper class tonight.
Ok, so yoga alone isn’t going to save me from the brain-munchers, but it’s as good a place as any to start. After a little while I’m planning to throw in some running* and who knows where it’ll go from there. Kale chips? Spinach smoothies? Protein shakes?! The way I’m feeling right now, all I know is I’m not stopping until I’ve realised my childhood dream of becoming the next Lara Croft…
*Just to clarify, by running I mean running for about 2 minutes, then walking until the burning in my chest stops, then running some more, then stopping while I try not to throw up. Hardcore.